3 Ways To Help Your Anxious Dog Relax

For some of you, it’s very obvious when your dog is worked up. Stressed, or anxious. For some, it’s not that easy to tell. Either way, we’ve worked with dogs experiencing symptoms of stress and anxiety for over a decade, and have found some tried and true ways to help them let it go.

Believe it or not, most of the dog owners we work with can’t tell when their dog is feeling anxious or stressed. At least, not until their dog becomes so anxious that the symptoms are more obvious and dramatic.

Here are some signs that might indicate that your dog is feeling stressed, nervous, or anxious:

• Appetite loss (picky eating or low food motivation are included in this)

• Increased hyperactivity or “frantic” behavior

• Jumping, especially on the people they are most bonded to

• Panting or “smiling”

• Pacing

• Struggling to focus or problem solve

• Struggling to settle and rest

• Whining, growling, barking, or drooling

• Lifting one front paw up

• Marking territory

• Going to the bathroom in the house (especially if they are already potty trained)

Being able to tell when your dog is starting to spiral (before they are too deep into their anxiety) can help you more proactively combat it… and help them!

Here are three things you can do to help your dog be less stressed and anxious:

#1. Use hemp or cbd based supplements to promote relaxation

This one is a tricky one. Which ones actually work? We’ve been helping dogs overcome fears, anxieties, and stress for a years. We know how many products are on the market claiming to calm your dog down, or to solve their anxieties. Unfortunately, most of them don’t do what the marketing claims.

So is there a benefit to using “calming supplements” for dogs?

Well that’s a loaded question, but after having used many different kinds in hundreds of dogs over the years… our answer is yes.

In our experience, these kinds of things do not transform your dogs behavior by themselves, but they can take the edge off and make life just a little bit easier for both you and your dog. Especially if you pair them with the kind of activities that we describe in #2.

It’s important to note, that good quality calming supplements work best when used consistently, instead of intermittently. This means that we have seen the most positive impact when dogs take them every day.

Here are three supplements that have helped us to help even some of the most stressed out dogs feel better:

1. VetriScience Laboratories Composure Chews - These are our top recommendation! They are widely supported in the professional dog behavior and veterinary community for a reason. They work more effectively than most other calming aides we have tried.
2. Hemp Oil For Pets - We absolutely love hemp oil or CBD oil, and have used it for both stress relief, and joint pain in dogs. It’s easy to just mix with some food daily to help take the edge off.
3. Zesty Paws Calming Bites - These are so convenient, and our dogs love the taste. This is our next favorite calming chew, and one of the brands we have seen the most success with!

We’re not going to be unrealistic… supplements can help you and your dog so much. It’s unlikely that supplements or calming aides alone will completely solve your dogs anxiety. In combination with the right activities and training, they can make the process much more smooth.

#2. Give them activities that promote licking, chewing, or sniffing. These three behaviors help to relieve stress and promote relaxation.

1. Use this stainless steel slow feeder bowl to create a calming activity for your dog to enjoy. We love using these to promote licking and help dogs relax. We just mix some canned wet dog food with a bit of water, fill the bowl a bit, then pop it in the freezer for a few hours! This can be a snack or a meal for your dog, depending on how much you fill the bowl. Give it to your dog anytime they need help relaxing, or they need a calm activity to do. We have had success giving them when we leave the house (especially for dogs with minor separation anxiety), during fireworks or thunder, or even just on a busy day when we need to help our dogs take the edge off and be a little more relaxed with the chaos. The design of this bowl makes it easy to clean (huge bonus for us), more challenging for your dog (which is a good thing!), and we’ve never had a dog chew the bowl up because of its stainless steel material.

2. Give your dog a treasure hunt to sniff out their food using a snuffle mat like this one. If you’ve never used a snuffle mat for your dog before, try tossing a few of their favorite treats on it the first few times they use it. Then use a mixture of a few treats with some of their normal dog food. Sniffing is a great way to provide mental stimulation, and to help your dog calm down.

3. Use a lick mat to give your dog a relaxing treat and help them chill out a bit. Not all lick mats are created equal though. This lick mat is our favorite, because we can attach it to our pups crate to help them relax and feel comfy in their “den”. For something a little more interactive, we love this lickimat wobble bowl, to help wear them out and calm them down. For things like bathtime, or having our dogs hold still while brushing them, this lick mat with suction cups is perfect. We have a collection of all of these to use for different things, and love them all. You can use peanut butter, wet dog food, yogurt, or many other things on the lick mats. We usually freeze ours to help them last longer.

4. Give them something to chew! We all know that most dogs love to chew, but giving them a dedicated “chew session” to help them decompress is great for helping them stay regulated and reduce stress. We’ll list a few of our favorite chews and bones below. Every dog is different, but we’ve had a ton of success with these ones for our own dogs, and dogs we have worked with over the years.

   • Odor Free Bully Sticks - Our dogs are obsessed with these!

   • Yak Chews - A great option for dogs who might go through bully sticks too quickly.

   • Pork Chomps - This is one of our favorites for smaller dogs.

   • Benebones - For long lasting chews, this is our go to option.

   • Marrow Bones - More for licking, instead of chewing, we refill these and freeze them!
     

5. Have them hunt out their food with this Snoop Dog Toy. Our pitbull absolutely LOVES this thing. The large size fits just about 1 cup of food, so you can use it to feed your dogs entire meal. Just like with the snuffle mat, you might have to use a few treats at first to show your dog how it works. This toy is both interactive, and helps your dog relax by having to sniff out all the food that falls out when they bop it around. It’s soft and quiet, which we also love, so it doesn’t make a ton of noise if we are busy on a call while our dog uses this. So far, it’s held up and been very durable too! We have 6 dogs of our own and we’ve used the same one for over a year.

#3. Make sure you balance all of their activity with rest

This one seems simple… but it makes a big difference. Dogs who are stressed or anxious typically have higher cortisol levels in their body.

Did you know that it can take 2-3 days for cortisol levels to drop back down to normal after a “stressful” event?

This means that your dog can show symptoms of being stressed long after the thing that stressed them out happened. It also means.. that if your dog is experiencing stressful things on a regular basis… they may never get the chance to lower those cortisol levels, and can become “stuck” in an endless loop of anxiety.

The thing that might surprise you even more… is that this can happen with “good things” and with “bad things”. Fun, exciting, adventurous things can cause spikes of stress in your dog that leaks out in the form of stress related behaviors afterward.

If a dog is terrified of thunder or fireworks… their cortisol levels will rise and they will become highly stressed when they hear thunder or fireworks. After the thing is over, those stress hormones will be floating around in their body for a few days before they fully recover.

If a dog is super crazy over the top excited to go to dog daycare…. their cortisol levels will rise and those stress hormones will still take a few days to work out of their system and back to normal levels.

Things that are both scary… and insanely exciting…can create a stress spike.

That’s why it’s so important to provide your dog with a way to decompress and relieve stress after a high energy event, whether it be a “good” thing or a “bad” thing.

For our dogs, and dogs we are training to feel less stressed and anxious, we always provide a rest period and calming activity after the higher intensity activity, to help them recover more quickly. Most of the things listed in #2 above are great options to provide this for your dog.

Here are some examples of activities we follow with a decompression period:

• A walk around the neighborhood (especially if they get excited by distractions)

• After an appointment at the vet or groomer

• A visit to the dog park

• After a friend that they love visits (guests coming over)

• After an exciting game of fetch (especially for dogs who are nuts about fetch!)

After something stressful or exciting, we like to give our dogs 15-30 minutes of decompression, followed by a “nap”. This is especially important for puppies, who need 18-20 hours of sleep per day!

An overstimulated, tired dog who is not receiving enough rest, will act more hyper, more frantic, and even more crazy! Despite what many might think. If it feels like you are exercising your dog a ton, but they still won’t calm down, this added piece of decompression and rest may be the missing piece for your pup.

In conclusion, make sure your dog has plenty of opportunity to rest, decompress, and receives the support they need from you to let all of their worries go.

Ditch the obedience... and just BE. Advice for your reactive dog.

Be with your dog.

Be in the moment.

Be present.

I feel like one of these days someone is going to crash into all of my opinions about obedience commands like the Kool-Aid man crashes through walls.

Fortunately, I’m not famous enough to attract any party crashers yet.

Today, I’m going to talk to you about something that can tremendously transform your dog… and you.

The power of WAITING.

With how fast our world seems to turn, and throw things at us… life can be constantly GO.

When we’re seeking relaxation and comfort… ADDING more instructions, more activity, and more …. stuff can make it even worse.

So ditch the robotic obedience commands, and let them choose.

I know that waiting isn’t always something that’s paired with fun feel good thoughts for us. We think of traffic. The long drive through lines. The fact that the grocery store refuses to open another register.

But in this case, waiting is the best thing you might be able to do.

Wait with your dog.

Wait FOR your dog.

Wait for them to process their emotions, and GIVE THEM THE FREEDOM TO DO SO!

And no, I don’t mean that you should ALLOW your dog to just charge into another dog like a jerk. Definitely don’t do that.

But give them a chance. Give them a chance to get their minds about them, and to fully experience and sift through how they’re feeling.

Dogs produce behavior based on a few things. The most important being:

Emotions + Changes in the environment.

They produce behavior because they are feeling something, and they produce behavior to control, change or manipulate something around them.

A dog will sit, because they know that if they sit, the desirable food item in your hand will lower to their mouth, and that they can eat it. They know this because you have manipulated the environment previously to teach them this pattern.

On the same note… a dog will bark, lunge, pull, whine, or maybe growl when they see another dog. So why are they producing those behaviors?

Because seeing another dog makes them feel something. Usually excitement, frustration, fear, or nervousness.

A dog who feels frustrated and nervous, is going to choose whatever behavior they can find to the be most beneficial to them. Period.

That most beneficial behavior is often the nasty reactivity you’re seeing. They do it because it works. They’re nervous, and would feel better if the dog went away. So they make a big scene and the dog goes away.

It makes sense that they would keep doing it! Why wouldn’t they continue to do something that is working? Just the same way a dog who gets a free Bojangles snack off of the counter will keep doing it… unless it’s no longer successful.

I feel like a train who is quickly starting to lean off the rails, so I’m going to get straight to the point.

Give your dog a chance to feel. Just… WAIT with them.

Let them make a big scene for a few minutes.. while the dog or person over there just… exists.

Wait until they figure out that their behavior is no longer influencing the environment in the way that has been successful in the past.

”my dog might get confused if I don’t tell them what to do though!”

Okay. Let them get confused a little bit.

That confusion is your BEST window of opportunity.

That confusion is where your dog may be most perceptive to feedback that you can offer.

That moment of “holy cow what the heck. This is not how this normally plays out and now I’m starting to question my course of action”

When your dog hits that point… that’s where you swoop in like the superhero you are…. and give them what they need to make it out on the other side a better dog.

That confusion gives you a window. Jump through it!

Jump through it and tell them “hey, yeah. I know it’s not working like it normally does. I know you’re feeling a bit unsure about what you’re doing now.. because it’s not working. Here’s what I’m sure of… and I want you to jump on board with me. Do this with me.”

Even if the “this” of that scenario is NOTHING. Reward them for just existing.. Just BE.

I’m going to paint a picture for you.

You’re sitting at the park with your dog. Literally. You grab a blanket, a bench, a table. And you sit. You hang out.

Another dog comes up, and takes a seat with their owner too. They’re about 50 feet away, minding their own business.

Naturally… your dog does their thing. They start to watch, they start to get excited, pull on the leash, bark, whine, growl.

They start to do whatever thing it is that your dog does.

and NOTHING HAPPENS.

The dog over there minding it’s own business is still there. They’re not moving.

You’re not moving or reacting.

The ONLY thing that’s changed is your dogs behavior… and how they feel.

Imagine how confused they’re going to become… when literally no one does anything?

When the pattern they are so used to doesn’t actually play out?

They’re going to keep making a scene for a few minutes. That’s okay.

Let them process.

Let them see you being an example for them. Calm. Confident. Relaxed.

They’re going to start to calm down… 99% of the time. Some might take longer than others… but it’s going to happen.

USE THAT. REWARD THAT!

That’s your golden spot guys!

Take it!

And again… just BE!

Be with your dog. EXIST.

Dog parks aren't the devil... an argument for the other side.

Don't take your dogs to a dog park for socialization... they're dangerous. 

They're dirty. 

They're unpredictable. 

Those are all things that dog behavior experts all over the country have said to dog owners. 

EVEN myself. In fact, I still say those things. I still mean them. 

I mean them because when it comes to the dog owners I work with, I want them AND their dogs to be safe. 

I want their impressionable puppies to have great experiences during their socialization period. 

I DON'T want dog owners finding out the hard way, months or years down the line, that the dog park ruined their dog. 

But here's why we (as professionals and community members) should get on board with them. 

Let's face it. People aren't going to stop using them. The cities are going to keep building them. 

Finding off leash legal areas to let dogs RUN and be dogs is becoming harder and harder in populated areas. 

And to be quite frank... the park itself isn't the problem. 

It's the professional dog industry... letting dog owners down that's the problem. 

Here are the REAL reasons dog parks are dangerous, unpredictable, and often unsafe: 

1. Dog owners don't KNOW when their dog is feeling stressed or overwhelmed, until those emotions turn into dramatic displays of behavior (growling, snapping, lunging, attacking). That's not their fault. Their vets, groomers, puppy class instructors, and dog trainers are letting them down. We're not providing the MOST important thing to dog owners, and that's the ability to ACCURATELY read their dogs body language. 

2. There is a huge misunderstanding about what "socialization" really is. Even many professionals are still sharing this information as if it came straight from the bible itself. Socialization is often seen as a "meet the puppy, introduce the puppy, pet the puppy, let the puppy say hello to every dog they see, take the puppy to dog daycare, to the dog park, the puppy should meet as MANY people/dogs/things as possible to properly socialize them". 

Let me tell you. This is a load of... well something smelly. Quality always trumps quantity. ALWAYS. Socialization in and of itself, is teaching puppies/dogs how to interact with their environment comfortably and appropriately. It has much less to do with actually meeting new people/dogs, and much more to do with teaching them how to handle new situations with confidence and ease. Oversocialization is nearly just as bad as... undersocialization for a puppy's development. 

3. Okay the only reason I have a point #3 in here is because point #1 is SO important to reiterate. As a dog owner, you can never control who shows up with their dog, or how that dog may behave. 

BUT! As a collective, if dog owners were better armed with the knowledge they needed to accurately read body language, spotting "problem" dogs will become much easier. You'll be able to know before they enter the gate that this one might be a bad match for a dog park type setting, giving you time to get YOURS out.

Seeing the tiny, subtle warning signs, will also allow you, as a dog owner, to prevent conflict among dogs BEFORE it begins. 

Imagine! Not wondering every again "why on earth did my dog do that? They've never done that before???". 

Unfortunately, you DON'T have that knowledge, because professionals are convincing dog owners everywhere (whether intentional or not) that obedience and basic training are the BEST ways to start to get a handle on your dogs behavior, or to start them right as puppies. 

With that, comes the issue that many of you are going through these classes (and don't get me wrong, a lot of them are still great), but STILL don't know how to understand what your dog is actually saying to you. 

But, I'm going to get to the point now. 

Dog parks are NOT the devil. 

Dog parks are a great resource for dog owners, to let their dogs run and have some liberty... and well... be dogs. 

Our industry though... the professional dog industry... we might be the problem. For letting dog owners down. 

I can already hear the arguments coming..... 

"But dog owners don't care!!" 

"They don't want to know about those little details. They just want a well trained dog."

"Average dog owners aren't going to put in the work to learn!"

BULL. CRAP. 

Dog owners don't get nearly enough credit from us. Yeah, there will always be people who really just don't care. 

But going in already believing that dog owners are "average", that they don't care about learning, that they won't want to learn... that's bullcrap. Plain and simple. 

We motivate dogs every day to do things that they might feel unsure of... are we not capable of supporting and helping PEOPLE do the same thing? 

Our cities aren't going to stop building dog parks. People aren't going to stop using them for their dogs. 

So... instead of fighting is... let's work WITH it. Let's use our impact as teachers and dog lovers to better prepare our community full of wonderful dog owners to use these resources in a safe way. 

The only way we can achieve that... is to believe that dog owners care enough about their dogs to care about learning. 

(THEY DO!)

And then to teach them. To support them... and to make these wonderful resources (dog parks), places that are safer, less unpredictable, and well... more fun! 

So, as a professional who used to be so vehemently against ANY use of the dog park (because of influence by other professionals who felt the same way), I'm going to start taking my dogs to the dog park again. 

I'm going to be a friend and support to other owners there. I'm going to help them with their dogs if they want and need it. I'm going to confidently advocate for my dogs, and lead by freaking example. 

Maybe I'm living in a fantasy Utopian place in my brain... but I don't believe for a second that dog owners aren't capable of being safe and responsible. 

I believe that they ARE.